As the residents of Zenitramania surely know by now, the Spaghetti has stepped up attacks on Zenitramania in recent months. In early September, Masident Miguelote con Bigote officially declared war on Spaghetti, after a brief period of peace in which we regrettably gave Spaghetti a chance to prove it was willing to work toward a better stigma of spaghetti through improving their behavior and ideals. Leading up to this declaration of war, several small towns in southern Zenitramania had been attacked by Spaghetti sympathizers. In late August the Zenitramanian Potato Intelligence Agency intercepted a frightening message from King Roma, the king of The Land of Spaghetti, to a Spaghetti Revolutionary known simply as Il Brutto (translated "The Ugly.") The message outlined what Il Brutto must do in that week to prepare for the Spaghetti Invasion.
Because we intercepted this message, we were able to prepare for the Spaghetti Invasion. But our initial resistance was futile as their forces poured in from Southwestern Zenitramania and conquered much of Southern Zenitramania. Below are updates of the war, which will be published when I remember to publish them, even if its long after the update's date:
September 2nd, 2010: Masident Miguelote con Bigote put the nation on Spaghetti Alert, and massed Troops in Southwestern Zenitramania awaiting the Spaghetti Invasion.
September 4th, 2010: The Land of Spaghetti invaded through Southwestern Zenitramania and Masident Miguelote con Bigote officially declared war.
September 5th, 2010: The Troops in Southwestern Zenitramania retreated to the nearby capital city of Ekim.
September 7th, 2010: The Spaghetti Invasion reached Ekim, but not until all government officials were evacuated to Yort Military Base in the Northern Mountain Region of Zenitramania.
September 13th, 2010: Most of southern Zenitramania had been conquered by the Spaghetti Invasion and Masident Miguelote con Bigote sent Troops under the command of General Balsaj to try to stop the Spaghetti from traveling north.
September 15th, 2010: General Balsaj's Troops contained the Spaghetti Troops in Southern Zenitramania and the leaders of Zenitramania began developing a plan for an offensive against the Spaghetti Invasion.
September 29th, 2010: A division of the Spaghetti Army of about 100,000 soldiers broke through the containment brigade of General Balsaj's troops directly south of the Yort Military Base and started heading toward the base.
October 3rd-6th, 2010: Yes, the beginning of this battle was on Universe Potato Day. But on this day, many Potato Troops were killed in a battle just outside of the Yort Military Base. Just as it seemed the Spaghetti Troops would break through the Potato stronghold on the evening of October 5th, and reach the Military Base, Fesident Perrmia was evacuated to an undisclosed location even farther north so at least one of the two Presidents would be safe, and Masident Miguelote con Bigote ordered General McWes to go out of the Base with every remaining soldier in the Base to fight back the Spaghetti. The Masident then sent out the retreat signal to the Potato stronghold so that they would retreat back toward the base, and halfway back to the base the Troops under the command of General McWes met up with the Spaghetti Troops early in the morning of October 6th. What followed was a four-hour firefight that ended when the first Anti-Spaghetti Herpies Bomb (ASHB) to ever be used in warfare was dropped. This bomb releases a deadly strain of herpies that latches on to the cells of Spaghetti and kills them within fifteen minutes. Within fifteen minutes, the battle was won, and the few Spaghetti Troops that remained were taken prisoner. General McWes was given the Masident's Medal of Awesomeness in recognition to the major role he played in winning the Battle of Yort Military Base, and was sent south with 75,000 soldiers to assist General Balsaj.
October 12th, 2010: As requested by Fesident Perrmia after the successful dropping of the first ASHB, the first ever mass production line of Anti-Spaghetti Herpies Bombs was completed and now fully operational. Generals McWes and Balsaj were facing difficult times fighting the Spaghetti Invasion back in the South, and were making little to no progress. However, once these bombs would begin being used widely, it was sure to make a difference.
October 24th, 2010: The first shipment of ASHBs from the mass production factory was received at Yort Military Base and loaded into airplanes which flew over battles in the South, dropping the bombs to assist the Zenitramanian Troops.
November 3rd, 2010: General McWes has reported to Masident Miguelote con Bigote "I have been working at them from the south, heavy attacks ensued but, we made it out with few casualties." He reported that the ASHBs have been very helpful in fighting back the Spaghetti and could be credited for the reason his troops are making out with few casualties. General Balsaj has been working at them from the north, and hopefully soon the invasion will be squashed when the two Generals' armies meet in the middle.